


Back to each other

by violetbear



Series: Beyond all reason [10]
Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-11
Packaged: 2020-05-01 17:18:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19182301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/violetbear/pseuds/violetbear
Summary: Safely back on the Tempest after the Archon's ship, Jaal seeks out Scott to make things right.





	Back to each other

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the delay. Please enjoy.

Too close. He had come too close to losing Ryder. Losing Scott. Too close to losing what he thought they had. Or rather what they’d had. Ryder probably wanted nothing to do with him after the way he acted after the Kett facility on Voeld. He had messed up. He had messed up bad. And he almost lost the chance to make it right. He wasn’t going to let that happen again. He was going to fix this. And he wasn’t going to wait another second to do so.

He stopped just inside med bay, surprised to see it empty. Empty of Ryder at least. Lexi sat at her desk, typing something into a datapad.  
“Do you need something, Jaal”, Lexi asked, not looking up.  
“Where’s Ryder? I thought...”  
“Since he died not even two hours ago, he’d be here? For both of our sakes, I checked him out and then ordered him to his room to rest for the rest of the night.”  
“Do you think he will?” He hadn’t seen Ryder slow down once in all the time he knew him.  
“I’m monitoring him through SAM and I told him if I see he isn’t resting, I’m telling Kallo to head for the Hyperion and he’ll spend a week in the med bay there. I think he’ll listen this time.”  
“I see.” He turned to go. Guess he would have to wait after all. He wasn’t going to do anything to jeopardize Ryder’s health.

“Of course monitoring him through SAM isn’t as effective as checking on him in person. I was just about to do that but this email from Harry about Sara just came through. Would you be able to check on him for me?”  
“Of course.” A chance to be alone with Ryder. A chance to see if he still felt the same. He couldn’t pass that up. “I’ll go do that right now.”  
“Thank you, Jaal.”  
He left the med bay and walked directly to the Pathfinders quarters. When the door opened, his eyes went straight to the bed. The empty bed. Where was Ryder? He was about to leave when he heard his voice.  
“You want more? Where are you putting it? Your tail?”  
“Ryder?”  
“Over here, Jaal.”

He walked over to the small sitting area. Ryder was lying on the couch, his head resting on the arm. One of his hands was laid on a ball of fluff on his chest. Though still wearing his white Initiative shirt, he had changed into a loose pair of black pants and his feet were bare.  
“Hey”, Ryder smiled at him. “Come to meet our newest crew member? He’s very cute and fluffy.”  
“No. I actually...” How did he say this without being too direct and scaring him away? “Lexi said you were...” As a frown appeared on Ryder’s face, he stopped talking. Stars, now he had upset him. Maybe he should wait after all. “Never mind.” He turned to leave. “I’ll leave you to your rest.”

“No, wait. Don’t go. I’m just mad Lexi put me on bed rest. Please stay.”  
“Bed rest”, he asked, turning back around. “Doesn’t that usually involve a bed?”  
“Semitics, Jaal. I’m lying down and resting. The rest is just...”  
“Semitics. Yes.” He ran an appraising eye over him. “How are you feeling?”  
“Good”, Ryder insisted, running a finger over the fluff ball and not meeting his eyes. “Bored but good. Don’t understand why I have to be still for the rest of the night.”  
“You died.”  
“Yes but I’m better now.”

“Died right in front of us”, he murmured, the horrible memory in front of his eyes. One second Ryder was alive and mad at being trapped. The next he was dead on the cold metal floor, his still form leaving him breathless. And when SAM failed to start his heart the first time...  
“Jaal, I’m alright. And we made it out of there.” Ryder pulled his legs up, making space on the couch. “Sit down. That is, if you want to.”  
“I’m a fool”, he muttered, walking over and sitting down.  
“If anyone’s a fool on this ship, I think it’s me.” The fluff ball squeaked. “Fine. But last piece.”

He watched as Scott grabbed a piece of cereal from the bowl on the floor and fed it to the fluff ball. Just hours ago those same hands were holding an assault rifle or blazing blue as he ripped Kett apart with his biotics. Now they were gently holding a fluff ball and feeding it cereal. The juxtaposition was mesmerising to him. Scott looked up and smiled at him.  
“Penny for your thoughts?”  
Another idiom. Why did humans have so many of them? Luckily, he knew this one. Not that he wanted to share what he had been thinking. Especially without knowing how things stood between them.  
“What are you going to name him?”  
“Haven’t decided yet. Can I ask you something?”  
“Of course. You never have to ask for permission.”  
“Why do you think you’re a fool?”  
  
"I...” How to phase this? He pulled Scott’s legs over his lap and started massaging his feet, collecting his thoughts before he spoke. “I let my anger at what happened on Voeld cloud my view of you. I might not agree with what you did but I came to realize you didn’t make your decision lightly. The Angara that died there. They probably weigh on you. “  
“All 863 Angara that were in that facility when it blew up.”  
“Eight hundred and...” His hands stopped as he looked over at him. “You know for sure?”  
“SAM managed to secure a list of the captives from their system. Names, ages, where they came from, when they were captured. I forwarded it to the Moshae and Evfra right before you got here. Hopefully knowing for sure what happened to their loved ones will help bring closure to their families. Then again, I might have just made a lot more enemies.”

“Not knowing is horrible”, he murmured, focusing his attention back on Scott’s feet. He thought back to the day his father had disappeared. They had never received any news on what had happened to him. “Trust me, I know.”  
“I looked but his name wasn’t there. Your fathers.”  
“I didn’t think you would.” Though he had still hoped to hear what happened one day. Perhaps he always would. “That was over fifteen years ago.”  
“Still. I saw how not knowing affected you. I had hoped to... I don’t know. It doesn’t matter.”  
Fool didn’t begin to cover what he was.

“Scott, I’m sorry. I never should have questioned your decision and---“  
“Don’t need to apologize, Jaal. You being so open with your thoughts and feelings is one of the things I...” He yawned and pulled his feet away. “Though you do need to stop that. I’m falling asleep.”  
“You should be asleep. You should be in bed”, he insisted, getting to his feet.  
“Then who would feed this cutie?” The question was barely out of Scott’s mouth when he yawned again. “Okay. Maybe you’re right about the sleep part. But I can sleep here.”  
“We’ll argue about that in a second. Give me the cutie.”  
“Me or the fluff ball”, Scott asked, his eyes half closed.

Jaal ignored him and gently lifted the fluff ball. He quietly crossed the room to put it in the cage by the desk. Turning back around, he smiled as he saw Scott’s eyes were closed. That was good. He needed the rest desperately. But he would rest better in his bed. Should he wake him and make him move? Or could he move him himself? Only one way to find out.

He walked back to the couch and gently lifted Scott into his arms. Scott didn’t wake up, which he took as a very good sign, so he started towards the bed. Making it without incident, he lowered Scott onto the bed and stood to leave. That is he attempted to. One of Scott’s hands was clenching his rofjinn. He moved to free himself when a single word broke the silence.

“Sorry”, Scott mumbled, not opening his eyes.  
“Scott?”  
“Please stay, Jaal.”  
His heart leapt in his chest. Did that mean he still had a chance with him? That he hadn’t ruined things completely. Or did Scott just want company? He would hope for the former. At least until he could ask Scott in the morning. Hope that he hadn’t ruined what might have been.  
“Let go and I will.”

Scott released him and he moved around the bed, getting in beside him. Scott moved in close, wrapping his arms around one of his own. Jaal put his other arm to Scott’s back, holding him close.  
Though part of him wanted to wake Scott up and question him, ask him if he still felt the same, he decided against it. He would enjoy what he had right now. Scott wanting to be beside him once more. Tomorrow, Scott might go back to avoiding him. Might decide to let what might have been go. He hoped not but at least for tonight he had Scott’s affection again. Tomorrow, he would work to gain Scott’s love. To make himself worthy of it. No matter what it took. Scott was worth it. He just hoped he hadn’t realized that too late.


End file.
